Alex,
Since I own both a symetric (J/30) and asym (J/109) boat, I can say that the asym on a boat that is designed for symetric just doesn't work as well. On Rhapsody I have single handed with the autohelm and flown the spinnaker. I have used a sock and no sock. The sock is more pain than it's worth. Here is what works using the symmetrical spinnaker.
1. Lead all spinnaker lines back to the cockpit (spin halyard, topping lift, foreguy, twings, spin sheets). If you have twing blocks attached to padeyes within a couple inches outboard of the shrouds, you'll find the foreguy isn't needed. If you put turning block on the stanchion bases by the primary winches, you can use the primary winches easily for trimming spin & pole. I have self tailers and a harken 150 to quickly lock a line in place.
2. Put a Harken 150 cam cleat on the mast to jump the spin halyard and topping lift. Once the spinnaker is up, you take the slack out of the halyard in a rope clutch aft and remove the halyard from the cam cleat.
3. You can launch from a bag on the rail attached on either side of the 1st stanchion. I usually do a dead headed launch when single handing.
4. Attach spin sheets and halyard. Twing on tight for the pole side. Pole up using the cleat on the mast, then take slack back aft and remove from cleat on mast.
5. pre-feed the guy end to the headstay (pull it out of the bag)and take the slack out in the cockpit. Put it on the primary winch, then pull pole aft about 2 feet.
6. Pre-feed the sheet to a mark you'll make where the spinnaker just starts to fill. This allows you to raise the halyard without getting pulled up the mast, or getting the spin wrapped around the headstay. Lock the spin sheet in the primary at this setting.
7. Heading about 30 degrees off the wind, raise the spinnaker halyard at the mast. lock it in place with cleat, then head aft to trim spin and pull halyard through clutch - take out of mast cleat.
Below is a picture taken when I was single handing Rhapsody around Conanicut Island with the spinnaker. The second picture is the asym spinnaker I bought off ebay. If you want to try an inexpensive sail, I'll sell this to you for $200 plus you pay shipping. Maybe it will work better with a bow sprit, but tacked to the bow, it just doesn't project enough to get a wide range of sailing angles off the wind.